Thirty Eight

I turned the ripe old age of thirty eight on the twenty fifth of January.

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If you had told me I’d be 37 weeks pregnant with our third child at the age of 38, I would have laughed hysterically in your face.

I never imagined I’d be a mother to one child let alone three. When I was in my teens and 20s I was sure I didn’t want children. Then I changed my mind and stated I’d like one (mostly, I knew I could only handle one, ha).

It wasn’t until I turned 30 that I/we seriously entertained the thought. Then I told myself my “cut off” (for having kids &/or getting pregnant) was 35. Obviously that didn’t work out quite like as I planned.

Isn’t that life though? You can make all these plans for the future, but in reality you’ve absolutely no control of how things will work out. Planning can only take you so far. That’s the frustratingly beautiful and exciting part of it.

I’m a planner by nature. I like to know what’s going to happen next – my next move, what I can expect, what is expected of me… It has taken me a long while to be OK with ‘going with the flow’, to relax. It wasn’t until I became a mother/parent did I realize I had to give up control sometimes (read: most of the time) and it’s totally OK to do so.

Here’s hoping the year ahead will be a good one. After all, we’ll soon be a family of 5 and it can only get better from there!

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I managed to find an hour and a half (a whole hour and a half, people!) of free time to go ahead and finish this piece.

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Sure, it was midnight when I was done, but I’ll take what I can get!

I miss drawing. It’s so nice to be able to just zone out and create random designs and such. It’s a good way to gain clarity and relax.

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Ink Weaver

As I ease into the last 4 weeks of my pregnancy, I’m finding it harder to carve out time for myself. With a 6y/o and 17 month old around, life can get a bit hectic.

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Tonight I made the time. It’s been months since I’ve drawn anything so it’s a little rough, but I like it just the same.

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On Being Pregnant

This will be my first pregnancy update for this site. I didn’t have a (public) blog for my last two pregnancies so I utilized FB and IG for quick updates and belly/bump photos. I figured since this will be our last baby I should at least write something about it here.

 

First of all, a little background…

I’m one of those crazy (lucky?) women who enjoy being pregnant. No, I’m serious!

With my first (C), my whole pregnancy was complication free. I felt great, was able to get around and didn’t have too many issues toward the end of it. It was truly empowering witnessing for the first time how my body changed, how my belly grew and provided for/nurtured another human.

His birth was an experience! At 37 weeks I was fully expecting to go past my due date because everyone and their uncle said FTMs are always overdue. BS! At 37.2 weeks, just like in the movies, my water broke in the middle of the night. Not with a trickle but with a gush! Since I wasn’t feeling any pain/contractions I was able to shower and get myself ready (yes, I even put makeup on ha).

My labor lasted for about 21 hours, with an epidural and pitocin, as it stalled mid-way. Pushing for 2 hours was beyond exhausting, but he was eventually born (with help from a vacuum). He was perfect and all ours.

As a first time mom, it forever changed me as a person. I never felt more proud of myself and appreciative of my body. Knowing I was capable of carrying and giving birth was amazing. I felt so in tune with myself and my body. Wholly goddess-like!

With my last pregnancy and being of advanced maternal age at 35 years old (insert eye roll here), there were more tests and possible issues to watch out for. My pregnancy with L was a surprise as it had been 4.5 years since C was born. We figured we were destined to only have one child (despite trying on and off and suffering through multiple miscarriages).

My experience was much different this time around. While I felt pretty good overall, I was diagnosed with GD at around 34 weeks. It definitely put a damper on my/our excitement for a bit. Thankfully, I was able to control it via diet and increased excerise (walking and prenatal yoga). I didn’t enjoy having to be mindful of what I ate, logging it and pricking my fingers but after a while it became routine and sort of like a weird science experiment.

Thankfully, the rest of my pregnancy with him was great. I enjoyed prenatal yoga so much as it helped me focus on the bigger picture instead of dwelling on the fact I couldn’t indulge as much as I wanted.

L’s labor and delivery could not have been more easy. Instead of a dramatic start like his big brother, I spent the first 6 hours of labor at home. Contractions started around midnight and naturally I couldn’t sleep. Not because they were bad but, because I was excited. I was breathing through contractions, channeling zen through each wave and managing it well. I was even able to shower, put on makeup (ha!) and gather last minute items for my hospital bag.

Once the contractions increased in intensity and frequency I woke up the Husband and told him it was time. I also told him to not rush since I was still able to talk through the contractions. Once we finally made our way to the hospital (after dropping off C at the ILs), I was admitted and we sat around waiting for full dilation. Once that happened, all it took was 3 big pushes and L was born; perfect as can be.

I was shocked at how quick it all went down as C’s delivery seemed to take forever. Perhaps it was me being more relaxed and knowing what to expect that helped? In any case, I was thankful for another positive birth experience.

 

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And so, here I am at 35 weeks pregnant with our littlest, baby O. I feel good. No swelling, blood pressure is normal, weight gain minimal, baby is growing on schedule. While I have more on my plate this time around (having to care for a 6 year old and an almost 17 month old) I’m surprisingly still full of energy. It must be a super power moms have; to be able to get shit done while it seems like anything and everything is going haywire – we’re just awesome that way.

I’ll be 38 in a couple weeks and I never ever thought I’d be pregnant at 37/38, let alone have 3 kids, ha. Sure my “old age” means I have to do twice weekly NST (non-stress tests) but it’s a minor inconvenience. Plus, I only have 5 weeks left.

Fortunately (and surprisingly!) this time around I don’t have GD. Usually if you have it with one pregnancy you’re more likely to have with your consecutive pregnancies. I was quite relieved and thrilled when I was told I passed the dreaded glucose test(s). Sure I can have all the carbs and sugar I want but I still try to make healthy choices especially since I’m still breastfeeding L.

That’s the other thing, my new goal is to breastfeed L and the new baby. Tandem breastfeeding isn’t too common but it can be done. I definitely want to BF both as long as possible. I feel so fortunate to have reached my goal (last year) to exclusively BF L for over a year. He took to it like a pro right off the bat and we didn’t have any major issues. Sure, he was attached to me seemingly 24/7 (he still is! lol), but the benefits for us far outweigh the minor inconveniences. I’ve also have become way more comfortable with BFing in public. I’ve done it pretty much everywhere (restaurants, malls, stores, Knotts Berry Farm, during his and my doctor appointments etc.) because it so much easier to whip out my boob than carrying around bottles and such.

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We’re waiting patiently for baby O’s arrival. It’s all up in the air as to when he’ll make his debut but I’m hoping he’ll take after his brothers and take it easy on me and his Dad during delivery. He’s our surprise baby and will most likely be the Aquarius (like me and the Husband!) to balance out our fiery Leo boys.

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Makeup Monday : FOTD

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I’ve been averaging about 5-6 hours of sleep a night. That’s pretty good considering I’ve got a 16.5 month old who still wakes every 4 hours and I’m almost 35 weeks pregnant. I’ll take any sleep I can get at this point because I won’t get ANY next month!

As a form of self-care I try to always shower and put my face on in the mornings. It helps wake me up and get my mind right for our busy weekdays.

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• FACE :
Olay Complete moisturizer
Maybelline Fit Me Dewy + Smooth foundation (220)
Amazing Cosmetics Amazing Concealer (Medium Beige)
MAC MSF Natural (Medium)
Too Faced blush (Papa Don’t Peach)
ABH Illuminator (So Hollywood)
NYX Dewy Finish setting spray

• EYES :
ABH Dipbrow Pomade (Ash Brown)
ABH Brow Gel
Urban Decay Primer Potion
Kat Von D Shade + Light Eye palette (Laetus, Ludwin, Succubus, Sytry)
Marc Jacobs Highliner Gel Crayon (black)
Urban Decay 24/7 Glide On eye pencil (Lucky)
Too Faced Better Than Sex mascara

• LIPS :
Maybelline Babylips Balm
NARS lip pencil (Rikugien)
Too Faced Creamy Peach Oil gloss (Papa Don’t Peach)

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